Though the seizures are still a part of our lives for now (though fewer), we are learning that Olivia's personality is also starting to be part of our lives. We knew her for a few months and then its as if she went away on a vacation and is just now beginning to return. She is not here in full form, but creeping up on us, which makes me concerned for the teenage years.
Though we have not witnessed consistant smiling in several months, we are just now starting to consistantly hear frustration and discomfort, which is a wonderful milestone. You can bet (I've seen this before a lot) that when a child cries continually and loudly some place in public, the NICU mothers are the ones who smile and seem almost happy to hear the noise.
For example, when the prostetics man (I guess there is a word for that) was making a mold of Olivia's head for the size she screamed for almost a half an hour. I wasn't bother, but almost encouraged by it. The real kicker was the woman who works at the front desk, Donna, who I have grown to appreciate, seemed almost in tears to the hear the cries. She knows what its like. Her baby was born very early and was in NICU for much longer than we were. She was so proud of Olivia in that moment, and so was I.
In the past week or so Olivia has continually grunted in frustration and even cried when she is uncomfortable or most when she is so tired but cannot sleep. To hear any noise from her a true blessing. I know the smiles and coos will come later, but for now the cries are just as sweet to hear.
We are truly blessed to know her and to be her parents. She teaches us things everyday and pushes us to be better people--to love better. I have learned that our life is different--mostly slower than everyone else's--but it doesn't mean that the things we do are less meaningful or important. The Lord is so good to bless us with this wonderful child who, we are learning, brings out the best in us--in everyone.